Which Dildo Should I Pick? The Ultimate Dildo Guide
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OhMyGasms Guide to the Dil-dos and Dil-don'ts
Choosing a dildo can feel daunting, with so many shapes, materials, sizes and features on offer, it’s easy to overthink or even make the wrong decision - and they’re not exactly returnable after use. The good news? Once you know what you’re looking for, finding the right dildo can lead to lots more fun, whether you’re after self-pleasure or partnered play.
Why Choosing the Right Dildo Matters
From realistic to fantasy designs, double-ended styles to colour-pop purples and even ones with warming features, the world of dildos is wonderfully varied and not just in size. The right choice depends on how you plan to use it and what sensations you enjoy.
- You might be shopping for:
- Solo self-pleasure
- Couples’ play
- Pegging or strap-on play (a slightly different consideration set)
Each intention brings different priorities around material, firmness, size and added features. Let’s break it down:
What’s the best material for you?
Material affects how a dildo feels, how easy it is to clean, and how body-safe it is.
Silicone Dildos
Many sex toy companies now choose silicone as their main material and it’s easy to see why. High-quality silicone is body-safe, durable, and designed to feel great against the skin.
- Non-porous and hygienic
- Soft, smooth and beautifully shaped
- Flexible yet supportive, depending on design
- Long-lasting with proper care
- Odourless and tasteless
- Does not contain phthalates
- Does not contain latex
Compatible with: Water-based lubricants only. Silicone-based lubricants can degrade silicone toys over time, so it’s best to stick with water-based options.
Feel: Smooth, skin-like and comfortable.
Silicone dildos are ideal if you want something versatile, low-maintenance and suitable for frequent use, whether solo or with a partner.
Glass Dildos
Glass dildos are smooth, sleek and surprisingly versatile. Made from body-safe, non-porous glass, they offer a friction-free experience that glides easily during use.
- Ultra-smooth and non-porous
- Firm and weighty for precise pressure
- Highly hygienic and easy to clean
- Durable and designed not to shatter during normal use
Glass dildos are especially popular for temperature play. You can warm them in a bowl of warm water or cool them under cold water to explore different sensations. Always avoid extreme temperatures and check for comfort before use.
Compatible with: Water-based lubricants (and suitable for anal or vaginal play).
Feel: Very smooth and firm, offering more intense stimulation.
Before each use, check for any chips or cracks. With proper care, glass dildos are long-lasting and luxurious to use.
Metal Dildos
Metal dildos are typically made from stainless steel, aluminium or titanium, and are loved for their solid, unyielding feel.
- Extremely firm and smooth
- Non-porous and highly hygienic
- Heavier than silicone or glass, offering a sense of pressure
- Suitable for temperature play (warming or cooling)
Metal conducts temperature easily, meaning it can be gently warmed or cooled to create new sensations. Many users find warmth helps the body relax, while cooler temperatures can heighten sensitivity.
Compatible with: Water-based lubricants only. Oil- or silicone-based lubes may damage the finish.
Feel: Very firm and weighty, delivering intense, targeted stimulation.
Care tip: Metal dildos are easy to clean, wash with soap and water, boil briefly, or place in the dishwasher without detergent. Be mindful of their weight and avoid use near electronics.
Types of Dildos Explained
Realistic Dildos
Designed to mimic the look and feel of a penis, realistic dildos often feature detailing and a softer outer layer. Popular for those who want a familiar shape and sensation.
Fantasy Dildos
Bold colours, imaginative shapes and playful designs. Fantasy dildos prioritise creativity and sensation over realism, perfect if you like something a little different. We have a magical dildo that is definitely not for novice adventurers.
Cloned Dildos
Made from moulds of real bodies, cloned dildos offer hyper-realistic proportions and detailing for a more personalised experience. These could also be a fun gift for a partner!
Suction Cup Dildos
A true multitasker. Thanks to a powerful suction cup base, these dildos can be securely attached to flat surfaces for hands-free fun. They also fit most strap-on harnesses with O-rings, making them ideal for:
- Solo, hands-free use
- Shower or wall play
- Pegging and strap-on play
If versatility is high on your list, a suction cup dildo is hard to beat. Careful using in the shower, though, make sure you have a shower mat or similar for grip.
Vibrating Dildos
Combining penetration with vibration, these dildos add another layer of stimulation. Many feature multiple intensity levels and patterns, allowing you to tailor the experience to your mood.
Heated Dildos
Designed to warm to body temperature (or slightly above), heated dildos create a more lifelike, comforting sensation, especially appealing if you find cold toys distracting.
Double-Ended Dildos
Double the ends, double the options.
- Suitable for couples’ play
- Useful for shared sensations
- Available in flexible or firm designs
A popular choice for connection and experimentation.
Size, Shape & Firmness: What to Consider
Size
Bigger isn’t always better. Consider:
- Length vs insertable length
- Girth and comfort
- Your experience level
If you’re unsure, starting smaller and working up is often the most enjoyable approach.
Shape
Curved designs can offer targeted internal stimulation, while straight shapes provide even pressure. Texture can also change how a dildo feels, smooth, ridged or sculpted.
Firmness
- Soft & flexible: gentle, beginner-friendly
- Medium: balanced and versatile
- Firm: precise and intense
How to Choose the Best Dildo for You
Ask yourself:
- Am I shopping for solo or partnered play?
- Do I prefer soft and flexible or firm and structured?
- Do I want extra features like vibration, heat or suction?
- How important is realism vs creativity?
There’s no “right” answer; it’s just what feels right for your body and your curiosity.
Dildo Care & Cleaning Basics
- Clean before and after use
- Use warm water and a toy-safe cleanser
- Store away from direct sunlight
- Pair with a compatible, high-quality lubricant
Proper care keeps your toys safe, hygienic and long-lasting.
Gemma’s Expert Insight
Gemma Nice, certified and multi-award-winning sex and relationship coach, shares her insight:
Can dildos improve couples’ intimacy?
Yes, dildos can absolutely support deeper intimacy between partners. Introducing toys often encourages more open communication, trust and emotional closeness, allowing couples to explore pleasure together rather than in isolation. These conversations can naturally lead to greater honesty about desires, boundaries and what feels good.
Using dildos together can also enhance physical intimacy by increasing stimulation and pleasure, which may lead to stronger orgasms and a greater sense of relaxation. This is partly because pleasure releases calming, bonding hormones that help partners feel closer and more connected. Over time, sex can start to feel routine, and introducing a dildo can be a gentle, positive way to reintroduce excitement and novelty into the bedroom.
Shifting the mindset from “a dildo will replace something” to “a dildo can enhance pleasure for both of us” allows couples to relax into the experience and enjoy more intimate, shared moments.
Is it normal to need time to get used to a dildo?
Absolutely. It’s very normal to need time to adjust, especially as different materials, such as silicone, glass or metal. All feel quite different in the body. Some may feel softer and more forgiving, while others are firmer or heavier and take a little getting used to.
It can feel slightly awkward at first, but once you relax, it often becomes much more pleasurable. Starting with a smaller size, using a compatible lubricant, and allowing your body time to respond can make a big difference. Staying focused on arousal and sensation helps keep the body in a calm, relaxed state, which allows nerve endings to respond more positively. With time and curiosity, you’ll discover what feels best for you.
How can people safely ‘size up’?
Sizing up should always be gradual and guided by how your body feels. Start small, use generous amounts of lubricant, and move slowly. Focus on slow breathing, warmth and relaxation, allowing your body to respond naturally rather than forcing progression.
If exploring anal play, begin gently and insert slowly, working up to fuller insertion only when comfortable. Anal training aids can be helpful for gradual progression. When using dildos with a partner, starting with mutual masturbation and introducing the toy once you feel relaxed can ease the transition.
When you’re ready to try a larger size, choose something only slightly wider or longer than what you’re used to, and build from there. Open, honest communication is essential — checking in with each other, sharing sensations, and voicing any discomfort or hesitation. Above all, listen to your body, use plenty of lubrication, and remember that pleasure should never feel rushed.
Final Thoughts: Pleasure, Your Way
Choosing a dildo should feel empowering, not overwhelming. Whether you’re drawn to sleek silicone, statement glass, hands-free suction or warming comfort, the perfect dildo is the one that suits your desires.
